Heartbreak Recovery Is Like Marathon Training

Simple steps to healing after a breakup

Oct 18, 2025

Overcoming vs Healing

There is a difference between overcoming a broken heart and healing from it. Overcoming means getting distracted with things like alcohol, work, or a new relationship to swallow the pain after the breakup. Healing means walking through the journey of heartbreak recovery. It is harder but much more rewarding. When you heal from a traumatic breakup, you feel whole again and are ready for a healthy relationship.

Here are my tips based on my experience with heartbreak recovery and healing after a breakup.

You can also read my personal story about going through the painful experience.

Let It Out

Accepting the pain is the hardest part of healing. Most people try to avoid it at all costs, but you should face it. If you need to cry even if you think you should be strong, allow it. Find your place and scream, hit a pillow, or lie on the floor like a child experiencing strong feelings. Repeat it anytime you feel angry, misused, or betrayed. Eventually, there will be nothing left to let out and that is the first sign of healing.

Cry, scream, hit something soft, or express yourself physically
Accept these as part of the healing process
Repeat as long as you feel the need

Remove Expectations

In these moments, we often want a fast way out. We count weeks and months, expecting to feel better. Unfortunately, the more you expect progress, the less you notice it. Removing time-related expectations is key. Planning fallacy is a cognitive bias where people underestimate the time, cost, or effort needed to complete a task. It applies perfectly to the healing process.

Let go of expectations about how long healing should take
Accept that recovery will take longer than you think
Celebrate small quiet progress rather than getting frustrated by stagnation

Do Not Jump Into Another Relationship

This is common advice, but it is crucial. Starting a new relationship too soon does not help you or your partner. You might subconsciously use them to feel better or validate yourself, but it will not heal your wounds. If you feel you cannot endure the pain alone, that is the clearest sign you should stay single for now.

Avoid new relationships while still in pain
The stronger your need to be with someone else, the clearer the sign to wait
Endure the pain alone even if it feels impossible

Hold On to Routines

Develop healthy habits to create structure during hard times. This builds the foundation of a stronger self. Progress will not appear overnight. Consistency matters more than speed. Over time, small efforts like going to the gym, meditating, eating well, or excelling at work will quietly transform your body, mind, and self-esteem. One day, you will look in the mirror and smile.

Create healthy habits like exercise, yoga, meditation, and nutritious eating
Stay consistent without expecting fast results
Appreciate your growth and self-improvement over time

Be Happy Alone First

This is not just a healing tip. It is a prevention strategy. If you are not happy alone, a breakup can break you. Life is temporary. Relationships can end overnight. Work on feeling whole on your own before relying on a partner for happiness.

Accept that everything is temporary and can change quickly
Cultivate happiness and wholeness on your own
If you are not happy alone, start working on your life first

If you are in this painful situation, don’t worry. Many people have been there and survived. Today it might feel impossible. You are angry and sad. Let it out. Do not expect to heal fast. Focus on working on yourself. Somewhere in the future, there is a stronger and happier version of you. Let that vision guide you.

Your heartbreak is not the end. It is the training ground for your comeback.

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