I feel this so much. After 23 years of marriage, living alone has been unexpectedly joyful. My life feels full…family, friends, meaningful work! So my aloneness isn’t lonely, it’s spacious. I love moving at my own rhythm, listening to myself without adjusting or explaining. I am not alone because something is missing. I am alone because nothing is lacking! ☀️ Loved your article!
I’m really happy to hear that you are finding your way and feeling whole and strong on your own. Many people would not be able to achieve this after 23 years of marriage. You can be really proud of yourself. Thank you for reading my article, and I wish you a wonderful year ahead as well. David
Thank you! Amazing life changing therapy and people in my life! The good, bad, ugly all of it make up my beautiful life story! Cheers to a second chance at living the second half of life! ☀️
Excellent article. I see this in me. I've been through multiple marriages and relationships. Now 17 years on my own in my senior years. I travel alone and meet wonderful people. I have a part-time gig that I love and I meet interesting people. I strength train regularly without interrupting someone else's schedule. I cook all my own healthy meals not worrying about making them too spicy.
Did I enjoy being in relationships? Absolutely. Do I enjoy being alone and taking care of myself? Absolutely.
Go where the river flows takes you. Walk the adventurous path where new things wait.
Thank you for sharing this. I love your perspective. It sounds like you have created a life that is both independent and full of meaningful experiences.
Your line about going where the river flows is beautiful. I’m really glad the article resonated with you.
This was very interesting. After a 20 year marriage, then being a live in carer for my mother for nearly 7 years, I'm living alone and adjusting to all that means. I still have things scheduled here and there, but I'm home by myself a lot. I am at the scrolling and Netflix stage still. I enjoyed listening to this, I find sometimes when I'm reading something it feels too long, or I get distracted. Thank you.
Thank you for stopping by and taking the time to listen to the work I put out there. From my point of view, the fact that you’re aware of your current stage (scrolling and Netflix) already puts you ahead of many people in similar situations. If you’re aware of it, you can also change it if you want.
You just need to ask yourself some questions about how you imagine yourself in the near future. Maybe it’s fine for you to watch Netflix and it’s a hobby of yours. If it happens consciously, then there’s no problem with that. I also scroll on my phone within a timeframe I dedicate for that and watch my favorite TV shows on Disney+.
The problem is when you’re not happy with these things, you don’t change them, and at the same time, you don’t know what you want either.
If I were to recommend one thing you could start doing as the next step in your life, it would be to go for walks without earbuds, podcasts, or music. Spend half an hour in nature without expectations, but with awareness. Pay attention to when you’re smiling and why. Notice what kind of thoughts you have. You don’t need to understand everything in your mind, just let the thoughts be.
Do this for a few months, and I’m sure it will help you discover more about yourself. Enjoy your journey!
I feel this so much. After 23 years of marriage, living alone has been unexpectedly joyful. My life feels full…family, friends, meaningful work! So my aloneness isn’t lonely, it’s spacious. I love moving at my own rhythm, listening to myself without adjusting or explaining. I am not alone because something is missing. I am alone because nothing is lacking! ☀️ Loved your article!
I’m really happy to hear that you are finding your way and feeling whole and strong on your own. Many people would not be able to achieve this after 23 years of marriage. You can be really proud of yourself. Thank you for reading my article, and I wish you a wonderful year ahead as well. David
Thank you! Amazing life changing therapy and people in my life! The good, bad, ugly all of it make up my beautiful life story! Cheers to a second chance at living the second half of life! ☀️
Excellent article. I see this in me. I've been through multiple marriages and relationships. Now 17 years on my own in my senior years. I travel alone and meet wonderful people. I have a part-time gig that I love and I meet interesting people. I strength train regularly without interrupting someone else's schedule. I cook all my own healthy meals not worrying about making them too spicy.
Did I enjoy being in relationships? Absolutely. Do I enjoy being alone and taking care of myself? Absolutely.
Go where the river flows takes you. Walk the adventurous path where new things wait.
Being alone? Yup, I can do that.
Thank you for sharing this. I love your perspective. It sounds like you have created a life that is both independent and full of meaningful experiences.
Your line about going where the river flows is beautiful. I’m really glad the article resonated with you.
This was very interesting. After a 20 year marriage, then being a live in carer for my mother for nearly 7 years, I'm living alone and adjusting to all that means. I still have things scheduled here and there, but I'm home by myself a lot. I am at the scrolling and Netflix stage still. I enjoyed listening to this, I find sometimes when I'm reading something it feels too long, or I get distracted. Thank you.
Dear Jenny,
Thank you for stopping by and taking the time to listen to the work I put out there. From my point of view, the fact that you’re aware of your current stage (scrolling and Netflix) already puts you ahead of many people in similar situations. If you’re aware of it, you can also change it if you want.
You just need to ask yourself some questions about how you imagine yourself in the near future. Maybe it’s fine for you to watch Netflix and it’s a hobby of yours. If it happens consciously, then there’s no problem with that. I also scroll on my phone within a timeframe I dedicate for that and watch my favorite TV shows on Disney+.
The problem is when you’re not happy with these things, you don’t change them, and at the same time, you don’t know what you want either.
If I were to recommend one thing you could start doing as the next step in your life, it would be to go for walks without earbuds, podcasts, or music. Spend half an hour in nature without expectations, but with awareness. Pay attention to when you’re smiling and why. Notice what kind of thoughts you have. You don’t need to understand everything in your mind, just let the thoughts be.
Do this for a few months, and I’m sure it will help you discover more about yourself. Enjoy your journey!
Thank you for your response.
We often forget that the purpose of the life is to enjoy it as much as we can, not only living in the survival mode
I just read the whole piece, David. I like how you dismantle the fantasy of invincibility and point instead to responsibility for your own inner life.
Thank you, @Wesley van Peer for reading it and for your feedback. Most things in life start with us, and this topic is no exception.
I'm a 77-year-old man, an unwillingly retired internist, who has been a community development facilitator here in Honduras for 24 years.
My opportunities are often not medically related.
It sounds so irreverent to say it is "fun," punctuated with real joy.
I can relate to every thought you have so beautifully expressed.
Of course, your essay is not short.
I hope we can figure out a way to get better acquainted.
Thank you, David, so much for this kind and thoughtful message. It really means a lot to hear that my essay resonated with you and your experience.