Thank you for your words. “I am becoming my authentic self" Is a mantra in a particular exercise within the energy healing modality called Reiki. I learned this at 65+ years of life. I was a lifelong people pleaser and I thought the more kind I could be, the more I'd be loved and accepted. I gave so much and was discarded by 3 key family members for not saying or being just who they needed me to be in a chaotic family dynamic. By returning to the divine within me, and connecting with the loving life force energy, authenticity is now my plan and goal. We must love ourselves deeply, just as we are, and onlythen can we flourish. 🪷
Thank you so much for sharing your story! I can relate to the people pleasing part because I spent decades believing that I had to earn love and acceptance by making others happy. It's wonderful that you've found your own path back to yourself. And I think it's a beautiful reminder that it's never too late to discover who we really are and start living accordingly. Wishing you all the best! <3
This hits home hard - thank you for your direct way of putting it! Did you use any tools in particular to “come home to yourself” or was it an intuitive, organic transition? I am struggling to be authentic and feel my own life inside, especially with my husband - so many years of pretending, following and pleasing.
It's my personal story, but what helped me a lot after my last breakup was consciously deciding to spend more time alone.
I didn't want to distract myself with another relationship, so I locked in, as people call it these days.
I went on long walks without listening to music, but I paid a lot of attention to myself and my surroundings.
I started figuring out which things triggered positive or negative feelings in me.
For example, I realized that whenever I see a little dog on the street, I get completely distracted because I love dogs. But I also noticed that I feel really uncomfortable sitting in loud restaurants.
I discovered which thoughts make me smile without any effort. For example, imagining myself traveling through Asia. I can spend hours looking at maps and searching for beautiful places to visit.
And there were many other small discoveries like that.
Once you have a better understanding of who you are, you can start bringing more of those things into your life. Not accidentally, but deliberately.
And that's when you start enjoying your own company.
After a while, you'll have a much clearer understanding of who you really are, what you enjoy, where your boundaries are, and how you want to live your life.
You'll be more confident expressing your opinions when people ask you something. You'll make better decisions because you know what you like and what you don't like.
It's a long journey, but it's worth it.
Since then, my life has become so much better, and I genuinely enjoy spending time with myself.
Forced performance of employment dictates in curriculum teaching was bit by bit adapted to creative intuition that resonated with the childhood experiences of students, brought sharing of authentic mutual joy of learning.
That is a beautiful way to put it. When the structure loosens enough to let real experience in something shifts for everyone in the room, including the teacher. Thank you for sharing this.
Thanks for sharing David, it's an unfolding in progress for me to learn how to be authentic, there are times where i think if i show my friends / family my real self i won't be liked. In that, im raising my son to be his most authentic self, because i don't want him to go through the things we did. :')
Thank you so much for sharing this, it means a lot. That fear of not being liked when you show your real self is something I know very well, and I think most people do even if they never say it out loud. The fact that you are already aware of it puts you ahead of where most people ever get. And what you are doing for your son is probably the greatest gift a parent can give. He will carry that with him for the rest of his life. Wishing you both well on the journey! David
This really resonates with me today. And sadly I share a very similar experience with you from my childhood never being able to please my mother.
My husband is also into astrophysics and I think it’s a really cool subject to nerd about, even though I don’t understand most of it 😅
Fun fact: When we lived in Cambridge, although I never had the chance to see Mr. Hawkins, I once had the honour to pack him a gift box of chocolates for the premiere of the film about his life.
Thank you so much for sharing this, that childhood experience leaves such a deep mark and I think many of us carried it much longer than we should have. I am glad the article resonated. And what a story about Stephen Hawking! That is one of those small moments you never forget. Packing chocolates for one of the greatest minds in history is honestly a beautiful detail. Please tell your husband he has great taste in subjects to nerd about! :):) David
That sounds like a really tough experience, but also like it led you to something really valuable. I love the “me pleaser” shift. I can relate to that a lot. There is something incredibly freeing about finally doing things because they feel right to you, not because you want to please someone else. Really happy for you and thanks for sharing this, man! 💪
Thank you for your words. “I am becoming my authentic self" Is a mantra in a particular exercise within the energy healing modality called Reiki. I learned this at 65+ years of life. I was a lifelong people pleaser and I thought the more kind I could be, the more I'd be loved and accepted. I gave so much and was discarded by 3 key family members for not saying or being just who they needed me to be in a chaotic family dynamic. By returning to the divine within me, and connecting with the loving life force energy, authenticity is now my plan and goal. We must love ourselves deeply, just as we are, and onlythen can we flourish. 🪷
Thank you so much for sharing your story! I can relate to the people pleasing part because I spent decades believing that I had to earn love and acceptance by making others happy. It's wonderful that you've found your own path back to yourself. And I think it's a beautiful reminder that it's never too late to discover who we really are and start living accordingly. Wishing you all the best! <3
This hits home hard - thank you for your direct way of putting it! Did you use any tools in particular to “come home to yourself” or was it an intuitive, organic transition? I am struggling to be authentic and feel my own life inside, especially with my husband - so many years of pretending, following and pleasing.
Thank you for your insights 🤗
It's my personal story, but what helped me a lot after my last breakup was consciously deciding to spend more time alone.
I didn't want to distract myself with another relationship, so I locked in, as people call it these days.
I went on long walks without listening to music, but I paid a lot of attention to myself and my surroundings.
I started figuring out which things triggered positive or negative feelings in me.
For example, I realized that whenever I see a little dog on the street, I get completely distracted because I love dogs. But I also noticed that I feel really uncomfortable sitting in loud restaurants.
I discovered which thoughts make me smile without any effort. For example, imagining myself traveling through Asia. I can spend hours looking at maps and searching for beautiful places to visit.
And there were many other small discoveries like that.
Once you have a better understanding of who you are, you can start bringing more of those things into your life. Not accidentally, but deliberately.
And that's when you start enjoying your own company.
After a while, you'll have a much clearer understanding of who you really are, what you enjoy, where your boundaries are, and how you want to live your life.
You'll be more confident expressing your opinions when people ask you something. You'll make better decisions because you know what you like and what you don't like.
It's a long journey, but it's worth it.
Since then, my life has become so much better, and I genuinely enjoy spending time with myself.
David… so much authenticity in your article! 👍
Thank you @ER Kumar🇲🇾 <3
I think we have all had our own version of that guitar, haha. Great post btw!
Hahaha yes! 🎸 Thank you, Abhishek!
Forced performance of employment dictates in curriculum teaching was bit by bit adapted to creative intuition that resonated with the childhood experiences of students, brought sharing of authentic mutual joy of learning.
That is a beautiful way to put it. When the structure loosens enough to let real experience in something shifts for everyone in the room, including the teacher. Thank you for sharing this.
Thanks for sharing David, it's an unfolding in progress for me to learn how to be authentic, there are times where i think if i show my friends / family my real self i won't be liked. In that, im raising my son to be his most authentic self, because i don't want him to go through the things we did. :')
Thank you so much for sharing this, it means a lot. That fear of not being liked when you show your real self is something I know very well, and I think most people do even if they never say it out loud. The fact that you are already aware of it puts you ahead of where most people ever get. And what you are doing for your son is probably the greatest gift a parent can give. He will carry that with him for the rest of his life. Wishing you both well on the journey! David
This really resonates with me today. And sadly I share a very similar experience with you from my childhood never being able to please my mother.
My husband is also into astrophysics and I think it’s a really cool subject to nerd about, even though I don’t understand most of it 😅
Fun fact: When we lived in Cambridge, although I never had the chance to see Mr. Hawkins, I once had the honour to pack him a gift box of chocolates for the premiere of the film about his life.
Thank you so much for sharing this, that childhood experience leaves such a deep mark and I think many of us carried it much longer than we should have. I am glad the article resonated. And what a story about Stephen Hawking! That is one of those small moments you never forget. Packing chocolates for one of the greatest minds in history is honestly a beautiful detail. Please tell your husband he has great taste in subjects to nerd about! :):) David
Thank you David, I'm really enjoying the information you are sharing and it helps. Thank you
You’re very welcome! I’m really happy to hear that it helps. Thanks for reading and for taking the time to tell me. 🙏
That sounds like a really tough experience, but also like it led you to something really valuable. I love the “me pleaser” shift. I can relate to that a lot. There is something incredibly freeing about finally doing things because they feel right to you, not because you want to please someone else. Really happy for you and thanks for sharing this, man! 💪