Why Traveling Alone Is the Best Thing I Ever Did
How being alone in foreign countries builds unshakeable confidence
I’ve never experienced a blackout before, but when I stood at the airport in Auckland, New Zealand after flying more than 24 hours, I simply forgot the PIN code of my debit card.
After entering the four-digit number wrong twice, I had one more try before my card would be automatically locked.
I took a short walk, hoping movement would bring more blood to my brain so I could remember the code I used almost every day at the supermarket.
It didn’t help.
My bank locked my card. They didn’t give me any support via phone because I didn’t know my identification code either. The customer support told me there was no way to unlock my debit card.
I stood there, 18,000 km away from home, alone, with limited cash in my pocket and no return flight ticket.
You can imagine that on that day, I learned a lot. I was naive and unprepared.
And this is just one weird moment from the last 15 years of traveling the world, mostly alone.
I made many mistakes along the way. I lost money, lost personal belongings, stepped on a sea urchin on the first day of a vacation in Tanzania.
But I never questioned whether I should book the next flight to a place I’d never been before.
In my childhood, when my father wasn’t drunk, he liked to show me places in the atlas. We looked at the Himalayas, the Mariana Trench, Antarctica, Siberia. We played a quiz where he asked me the capitals of countries.
I grew up with an explorer mindset without seeing anything of the world because my family never went on vacation. Ever.
When I finally got my life together, I knew exactly what I wanted to do.
My girlfriend at the time didn’t share the same interest, but I convinced her to do some traveling together. A week in Côte d’Azur in France. Another week in Amsterdam with another couple.
It was great, but I wanted more.
Once I ended that relationship and moved to another country, there was nothing standing between me and the world.
I was so motivated to catch up on everything I’d missed that in 2017, I traveled to 16 countries in one year.
I’d planned for 44. That’s how naive I was.
But that naivety made it possible to see more than most people I know and become the man I am today.
The naivety developed into careful planning.
The hesitant traveler became confident.
In this article, I want to share what solo travel taught me about confidence, self-reliance, and becoming comfortable anywhere in the world.
You’re Forced to Make Decisions
Most people traveling together look at each other and ask, “What do you want to do? Where should we eat?”
When you’re traveling alone, you can’t turn to anyone. You have to decide on your own.
For most people, it’s difficult as hell because they don’t know what they want.
It’s something you learn with time, but only if you’re in a situation where you’re forced to think about it, to make wrong decisions so next time you’ll know better.
I remember when I first flew to Lisbon, Portugal. I sat in my Airbnb with no idea what I wanted to do for the next five days in that city.
It was difficult, and I almost spent my first day only in this tiny room I rented. I thought everyone else in that situation would think it’d be nice to discuss this with someone and decide together.
But I didn’t want to be dependent on others, so I forced myself to do something. The easiest way to create a plan is to look for the highlights of the place, even if it sounds way too tourisistic. The top 10 must-haves are always available on the internet, which can give you structure.
I started organizing day trips in Lisbon. I reserved a table at a restaurant only for myself and booked a ticket for the aquarium because I love watching animals and underwater life. I sat on the main square and watched people. I tried some local food and specialties, and after four days, I’d experienced quite a lot on my own.
It felt great because in the end, I’d made a lot of decisions for myself. I didn’t decide perfectly, but at least I made up my mind and went out. At that time, this was a huge success for me.
Today, I know much more about what I love, and it makes it easy to spend my time wherever I am in the world. Making decisions feels more intuitive and less forced by the urge to do something at all.
This is something you can learn too. But only by doing it scared. Only by sitting alone in that Airbnb, forcing yourself to choose.
The confidence doesn’t come from knowing what to do. It comes from deciding anyway.
You’re Forced to Solve Problems Alone
As you read in the introduction, when you’re traveling alone, you face problems you need to solve alone.
Even after I forgot my PIN code completely, I spent three weeks in New Zealand. But I got ripped off many times in other countries. I lost personal belongings, missed flights and trains, lost an expensive train ticket in Japan (the nice Japanese people gave it back), had food poisoning in Sri Lanka, stepped on a sea urchin in Africa.
In those moments, yes, I was very annoyed. But these problems also taught me that I’m capable of surviving alone and can solve more problems than I thought.
The best way of learning is always when you don’t have a plan B. You can’t call mom and dad to help you out. You can’t turn to a girlfriend, wife, boyfriend, husband, or friends to ask what to do now. You’re locked in a room with the problem like being with a grizzly bear in a honeymoon suite, and there’s no way out.
Your brain starts working differently. It goes from a problem-oriented mindset where you might lose yourself in some kind of victim mode to a solution-oriented Indiana Jones mindset.
And believe it or not, 99% of the time, there is a solution, and you will find it.
With time, you become more relaxed. You plan better, which reduces the probability of problems because you know what to pay attention to.
And this is not only something you can profit from during your trips, but this is a skill, the problem-solving skill, you can apply in your everyday life as well.
That problem at work that seemed impossible? You’ve already navigated a foreign city with food poisoning and no working phone. You can handle a difficult client.
That conflict with a friend? You’ve already negotiated with a taxi driver who didn’t speak your language and was trying to overcharge you. You can have an honest conversation.
Solo travel doesn’t just teach you to solve travel problems.
It teaches you that you can solve problems.
You Learn What You Actually Like
When you’re with others, you compromise. You go to restaurants you don’t care about. You visit museums you’re not interested in. You say yes to things because someone else wants to do them.
When you’re alone, there’s no one to compromise with.
You discover what you actually enjoy. Not what you think you should enjoy. Not what impresses others. What genuinely interests you.
I learned I love silence. I learned I prefer hiking to nightlife. I learned I’d rather sit in a quiet café for two hours than rush through ten tourist attractions.
These weren’t things I knew before. I thought I knew myself, but I was performing a version of myself I thought others expected.
Traveling alone stripped that away.
Now, in everyday life, I know what I want. I don’t say yes to social events I don’t want to attend. I don’t pretend to enjoy things I don’t. I don’t shape my life around other people’s expectations.
That confidence to know yourself and live accordingly? That’s what solo travel gives you.
Quick favor: If this resonates with you, I’d be grateful if you subscribed to Running Home. I share more stories like this about growth, awareness, and the messy journey back to yourself. It’s free, and it helps me keep writing honestly. Thank you. — David
Your Worldview Changes Completely
I know many people who are afraid of traveling. They project everything they see in the news or on social media onto the whole world. They can’t differentiate people from their political leaders and believe the world is a very bad place. There are bad places for sure, but you shouldn’t judge nations based on the news on television.
Earlier in my life, I was one of these judgmental people.
My parents’ worldview was very limited and extremely negative. They judged all of humanity based on what they saw in the news or heard on the radio. They told me which countries were very bad and where I should never travel to.
The best thing was to simply stay at home so you could be safe. They did that their entire lives.
I couldn’t accept that. The courage to go to places grew in me, so I went to find out using my own two eyes whether a place was bad or not at all.
I can tell you that in 99% of cases, I was surprised in a positive way.
People I met during my travels were welcoming, nice, and friendly. I rarely experienced rude or offensive behavior. And even when I did, I didn’t project it onto the whole population of the country.
When I traveled to China, people told me I was making a mistake. “They will put you in jail,” they told me.
When I was in China, I felt amazing. Elderly people did tai chi in front of my hotel in the morning. The people at reception stood up every time I arrived. They were nice, friendly, and supportive.
I never felt in danger or experienced any sketchy situations.
Since I’ve been traveling alone, my view of the world has changed a lot. I know that horrible things happen everywhere, but the black-and-white view turned into a more optimistic, less judgmental view. Most people on earth simply want to have a good life, laugh, and experience great moments, just as I do.
We’re not that different as we might think.
This changed how I live at home too. I’m less critical and fearful but more open and trusting.
You Learn Things You Never Planned to Learn
I know what to do when a snake bites me. I know what wild animals you can see in Albania in the mountains when you’re hiking and what to do when a bear stands before you. I learned about the boiling frog analogy in Seattle from a family I lived with for two weeks. I know that if you step on a sea urchin, you can use papaya leaves to heal it.
These aren’t essential things people usually learn, but this is also something I love about traveling.
You become a person with unexpected knowledge. Random skills. Stories no one else has.
And this makes you confident in a different way. You realize you can learn anything. Adapt to anything. Figure anything out.
These skills don’t disappear when you land back home. They become part of how you approach everything.
You Realize How Little You Actually Need
I think this is something most travelers learn with time.
Back when I flew to Mexico, I had huge baggage with me plus my backpack, just to hang a bunch of clothes in the closet in the hotel room and bring them back home without even wearing them once.
Today, I travel with a backpack or a small trolley bag. And still, every time I think I could have carried less stuff.
I got familiar with washing clothes abroad, checking out laundry services or booking Airbnbs with washing machines. I stopped carrying a lot of gear because I don’t really take a lot of photos, and definitely not professional ones.
When I traveled to Iceland with a good friend, I remember having a small bag with my Canon camera, GoPro Hero, selfie stick, various adapters and cables. Then I had clothes for almost a year and half my bathroom.
Over the years, I understood that I don’t need a lot. Most of my needs fit in a backpack, and if I need any services, I go out and find a solution wherever I am.
This realization also led to my current minimalistic lifestyle. I don’t buy stuff anymore, only if I really need something. I focus on quality instead of quantity, and I ask myself 1,000 times before I order something whether I really need it or not.
It’s good for my bank account, and it’s easier to move as well.
The Moments You’ll Never Forget
When I arrived in Tromsø, Norway, it was late, around 11pm. People waited in lines for cabs, but there weren’t many. I did the same, stayed patient.
After half an hour, it was my turn. I jumped in the cab and showed the driver where my Airbnb was. He drove me to that street and stopped somewhere in the middle.
I didn’t know where my apartment was, but I paid and got out of the car. The cab disappeared in the darkness, and I stood there in the middle of the street. It was snowing, but with really huge snowflakes.
There was no soul around, only those dark houses on both sides of the street. I stayed for a while because I rarely experienced such incredible silence. I heard the snow falling. Everyone was sleeping in those houses, and they didn’t know that this weirdo was standing in the middle of the street and listening. It was spectacular.
That moment is one of the many great experiences I will never forget.
I was alone. I didn’t share it with anybody. But I also believe it wouldn’t have been so powerful if I wasn’t alone in that moment.
Here’s another one: When I was in Osaka, Japan, I spent a day exploring the city. Late afternoon, I went back to my hostel, which had an outdoor terrace. Back then, I smoked, and I bought a few beers so I could sit outside after the day.
The receptionist came out, a French girl who also smoked a cigarette. We didn’t talk, but after a few minutes, she said to me: “You look so happy.”
I was surprised and didn’t understand why she thought that because I looked terrible in my opinion. I wore a t-shirt with toothpaste spots on it. My hair looked like a bird’s nest. I was smoking and drinking beer from a can like a homeless guy.
Still, she said I looked really happy in that moment. When she went back inside, I needed to think about what she just said.
Until that moment, I didn’t realize that I was actually happy. That was a time between changing jobs, having enough money in my pocket, free for a couple of months, and traveling in Asia.
I was living my dream and hadn’t taken the time to realize it.
Thanks to her, from that moment I started to appreciate my life even more.
These moments might seem irrelevant to you, not a big deal. But for me, these moments were and stayed very important until today.
I learned about myself that I love enjoying silence, wherever I am, and that traveling the world is something that truly makes me happy. Even other people can notice that.
I could write more about these moments, but I wanted to highlight two of my favorites to demonstrate the power of traveling alone.
Once you start exploring the world on your own, you will also have your own stories that don’t mean anything to others but mean the world to you.
The Confidence That Follows You Home
Here’s what people don’t tell you about solo travel: the confidence doesn’t stay at the airport.
It follows you home:
When you have navigated a foreign city without speaking the language, office politics seem far less intimidating.
When you have solved problems alone in countries where you know no one, asking for help at home becomes much easier.
When you have walked into restaurants alone on the other side of the world, sitting by yourself at home no longer feels uncomfortable.
When you have started conversations with strangers while traveling, meeting new people in everyday life feels natural.
When you have made decisions on your own again and again, you begin to trust your judgment more.
When you have gotten lost in unfamiliar places and still found your way back, small problems in daily life feel manageable.
When you have carried everything you need in one backpack, you realize how little you actually need to live well.
When you have experienced beautiful moments alone, you stop believing that happiness always depends on other people.
When you have adapted to different cultures and situations, change in your normal life feels less threatening.
When you have discovered that you can handle the unknown, many everyday fears lose their power.
The man I am today was built in those moments. Not in one big transformation, but in a thousand small decisions made alone.
Each moment taught me: I can handle this. I can handle myself. I don’t need anyone to validate my choices or hold my hand through life.
That’s the real gift of solo travel. Not the stamps in your passport. Not the photos. Not the stories you tell at parties.
You learn to enjoy your own company. To make decisions without external validation. To solve problems without asking for permission.
That’s why I still travel alone. Not because I can’t find people to go with. Because the person I become when I’m alone is the person I want to be all the time.
Confident. Self-reliant. Comfortable anywhere.
If you lack confidence, don’t wait to feel ready. Book the ticket. Go alone. The confidence comes from doing it scared, not before.
I’ll see you out there.
Thanks for sticking with me through this one. If you’re going through something similar, or have your own experience with this, drop a comment. I read every one. — David
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