How to Get Your Shit Together: The Zero Balance Philosophy
How to stop drowning, reach the surface, and finally start building the life you want
I literally started my life with a negative balance.
My confidence and self-acceptance were demolished by my mother’s constant criticism, and my emotional regulation was destroyed by the chronic stress and existential terror at home.
While other people grew up in warm and loving homes, I reached adulthood full of insecurities and without any plan for what I wanted to do with my life.
I’m not complaining, but it’s important to understand why we end up where we do. Back then, I thought everyone started from zero and all we needed to do was build up. I was completely wrong.
I went on dates wanting a girlfriend, but I had no plan for my life.
I went to the gym wanting to gain muscle, but I was smoking and drinking heavily.
My sleep was a disaster. I was in financial debt but still spent money on useless things.
I had no idea what I was actually interested in.
It was like trying to run before I could even walk.
It took me years to realize I was operating in negative balance across multiple areas of my life.
But once I did, it became obvious what I needed to do: I had to get to zero first.
It sounds harsh, but many of us have to work incredibly hard just to reach the baseline that others were given by default. A difficult childhood isn’t the only reason you can end up below the zero line, it can also come from unexpected hardship, addiction, illness, bad habits, or even laziness.
The baseline is different for everyone, but there are general principles that define it for most of us.
The Zero Balance Framework
Zero balance doesn’t mean being rich or extraordinarily successful.
It means having the basics right.
It’s about creating order in your life so you can actually build something.
It means getting a good night’s sleep so you start each day with positive energy instead of always falling behind.
It means not having debt dragging you down.
It means your apartment isn’t chaos.
It means your body gets healthy food and your blood work doesn’t show warning signs you’re ignoring.
Think about it: You can’t build muscle if you’re not sleeping. You can’t buy a nice car if you’re still paying off debt. You can’t confidently talk to someone you’re attracted to if you don’t have a decent haircut or proper clothes, and you definitely can’t answer “What are your plans?” if you have none.
When you’re in negative balance in multiple areas, they compound into a debt spiral:
Poor sleep from staying up late doomscrolling and drinking → tired at work → can’t focus → underperform → boss notices → lose your job → money problems → more stress → can’t sleep at all.
Or: Financial debt → can’t buy decent clothes → feel ashamed → avoid social events → loneliness → mental health problems.
Or even simpler: Messy, chaotic apartment → mental fog and constant discomfort → poor decisions → more chaos.
Every single negative balance in your life can trigger a spiral. If you’re not aware of it, returning to zero becomes nearly impossible.
The good news: Once you become aware of these debts, you can start working to regain control and get back to zero.
Here are the most important areas to examine so you can start leveling up.
Building Your Foundation: The Core Areas
1. Sleep
This is the most important area of all because it affects everything else on this list. Your energy level, mood, and decisions depend on the quality of your sleep. If you’re constantly tired, your most essential need is unfulfilled. You’ll experience food cravings, make poor decisions, skip your plans, and you’re more likely to get in an accident or injure yourself during workouts.
Zero balance: 6-7 hours consistently, no sleep debt, not dragging through your days
Positive balance: 7-8 hours, waking refreshed, actively improving sleep quality
First step: Set a consistent bedtime and develop a proper evening routine with no phone, no alcohol or heavy food, and stick to it for two weeks
2. Physical Health & Appearance
Getting a good night’s sleep is the foundation of your physical health, but it doesn’t automatically mean you’re at zero with your body. If you can’t take the stairs without stopping to catch your breath, you’re definitely below baseline. Being active — both cardio and strength training — can help here quickly. You don’t need to become an ambitious athlete, but being active three times a week would boost your energy level and physical fitness enormously. A healthy body is also the foundation for the next area on this list.
Beyond physical fitness, I have to mention essential grooming because your appearance can also put you below zero. Get that haircut regularly. If you’re a man, shave or maintain your beard. Cut those nails. Clean your ears. Even just doing the basics can bring huge improvement in your appearance.
Zero balance: 2-3 times a week, at least 30 minutes of physical activity (walking, jogging, cycling, strength training)
Positive balance: 2 cardio days and 2 strength training days per week, gaining muscle and improving VO2 max
First step: Go for a walk before or after work. Check out the local gym just to get into that space.
3. Mental Health
As you get physically healthier, you’ll see improvements in your mental health as well. Getting a healthy body boosts your confidence. You’ll like what you see in the mirror more. You can start smiling at yourself. It improves your self-esteem.
Beyond that, you need to pay attention to your stress level and emotional state. If you have unprocessed trauma or any other mental issue, start taking care of it. Otherwise, it can negatively impact all the other areas. Learn to control your emotions, or they will control you, and not for your good.
Zero balance: Aware of your stress and emotions, starting to manage them
Positive balance: Practices in place (meditation, journaling, therapy, yoga)
First step: Daily check-in with yourself
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4. Environment
This is an underrated life hack, but cleaning up your apartment, sorting out your unnecessary stuff, and having a neat living environment brings a lot to your daily life. I personally can’t think clearly if my home looks like a mess, and it stresses me quite a bit. If your home is clean and neat, you can invite people anytime. Make your bed after you wake up. Wash your dishes after eating. Clean that toilet every week. It’s a form of self-respect, giving yourself a nice environment to live in. How can you expect others to respect you if you don’t respect yourself at all?
Zero balance: Clean space, functional wardrobe, no clutter chaos
Positive balance: Organized systems, intentional belongings
First step: Clean one room completely, sort out your wardrobe
5. Finances
Disclaimer: The following section does not constitute financial advice. It reflects solely my personal experience and opinions regarding financial health. For professional financial guidance, please consult a qualified advisor.
Alright, now it gets serious.
Until this point, we’ve handled the basics: you sleep well, you look good, you think clearly, and you have a clean desk to sit down and focus on your finances.
The first thing you need to do is establish a status quo.
Do you know how many subscriptions you have?
Do you know how much money you spend on them?
How much do you pay for electricity?
Do you have debt?
How much money do you make?
You need a very clear overview of the data. Use your bank account and start calculating: income versus expenses. If you’ve never done this before, it can be a surprising process to realize how much you spend on coffee or online shopping.
Are you dreaming about investing?
That belongs to positive balance. Getting to zero means you know your numbers exactly and have a plan to improve them. If you have debt, your first and most important mission is to pay it off. Until then, you’re below zero. To do that, you need more money, so either you cut your expenses or you start making more money. Both are possible, but at the beginning, cutting costs is easier than getting stressed about how to make more. So cut the coffee, the many subscriptions, the credit cards, and start working to get to zero.
Zero balance: No debt, know your numbers
Positive balance: Saving, investing, clear budget
First step: Track everything for one month
6. Work & Career
Since you’ve started saving money, now here’s the opportunity to increase your income by boosting your career.
This is also something you need to start with a reality check.
Do you like your job?
Is there any opportunity to move up and earn more?
Have you asked your boss?
Or have you just gotten used to the life you’re living and never even thought about it?
It’s time to be proactive here because you want to have a plan.
Sometimes we’re working at the wrong place, but we’ve become accustomed to the situation and never asked ourselves if we have other options. My good friend just quit his job and went to another company. After three weeks, his new employer asked him if he wanted to become a department lead. At his previous company, there was no option like that.
It doesn’t matter what your job is. Sit down and think about it.
Is there a similar employer where you could ask for the same job but for more money?
Is there any skill you could learn to level up at your job and get better paid?
Have you asked your boss about perspective and opportunities to advance?
Be aware of your current situation and ask yourself every week what you can do to get further. Being proactive and motivated is not only attractive to your partner but also to your employer.
Take action.
Zero balance: Job you don’t hate, clear on next step
Positive balance: Building skills, clear path, taking action
First step: Define what you want next
7. Relationships
Imagine this situation: You slept well and you have a lot of energy because you’re doing sports and eating well. You can listen to people easily because your mental health is stable. You can invite friends over because your apartment is clean and welcoming. You don’t have stress because your finances are solid, and you can even order a pizza for your friends. If they ask you about your personal plans, you can tell them you’re learning a new skill and asked your boss about the next steps in your career.
This decent person is you.
People are listening to you because they think your life is interesting.
You have a plan.
You look good and you’re reliable.
At this point, building those relationships will be much easier because you can be fully yourself. You don’t have to make up stories about your nonexistent plans or explain why you can’t invite somebody over again. In this state of your life, you’ll be able to cut off all the toxic people who can drag you back below zero.
You don’t have to wait to be chosen by others all the time, you can also choose who you want to hang out with. This means you build healthy relationships with people who build you up, support you, and are there for you.
Zero balance: No toxic relationships, aware of what you need
Positive balance: Meaningful connections, working on them
First step: Audit your relationships honestly
How to Start Your Zero Balance Process
It’s very important not to try fixing everything at once.
That would frustrate you because there might be many things you want to improve at the same time.
My recommendation is always to start with the most essential areas like sleep, physical health, and mental health.
If you don’t have those, you’ll probably fail in all the other ones because you don’t have the body and mind that can carry you through all the challenges you face in your daily life.
The goal is sustainable order, not overnight transformation.
Here’s how to actually do it:
Start with sleep. This is non-negotiable. Fix your sleep first before tackling anything else. Give yourself two weeks of consistent sleep routine before moving on. If you can’t maintain it, don’t move forward, stay here until it sticks.
Once sleep is stable, add physical health. Start moving your body regularly. After another two or four weeks of consistency with both sleep and movement, you’re ready for the next step.
Then address your mental health. Start checking in with yourself daily. Begin noticing your stress and emotions.
Only after these three are stable should you tackle environment, finances, work, and relationships. Pick one at a time. Get it to zero. Then move to the next.
If you slip: Don’t panic. Slipping back below zero in one area is normal. The key is catching it early and addressing it before it spirals. Use your awareness to course-correct quickly.
Be patient with yourself. Getting all seven areas to zero might take months or even a year. That’s fine. You’re building a foundation that will last the rest of your life. Rushing it defeats the purpose.
Conclusion
Having your shit together isn’t glamorous. It’s not about being the richest or the most successful person in the room. It’s about knowing where you stand and moving forward with clarity. It’s the opposite of chaos. Start with awareness of your negative balances, then take one step at a time to get back to zero. From there, you can finally start building the life you actually want.
Thanks for sticking with me through this one. If you’re working on getting to zero in any area of your life, or if this framework resonates with you, drop a comment. I read every one. — David
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